There is something going on with Ela. Something that worries me. I think it has to do with all the stuff that Anna told us a while back, ( I am trying my best to organize that into something coherent and readable). There is a lot of story there but I can understand Ela's feeling of loneliness. I am trying to do what I can but sometimes it is tough. With me going through a bit of soul searching and strange moods I can't quite get a grasp on it. it is hard to give her the support she needs. Idk, we hav been thru tough times in the past. but that was all about isk, and disagreements, and substance abuse etc etc. But this feelings is different. It comes from within. I try to remain positive and at least appear cheery on the outside. If I come off as anything other than strong and stable it could send Ela into a spiral. Ela doesn't need that. She has too much good things going for her. I have to keep it together. I can.
